Another reading for me

My friend who did my reading last May did another reading for me. For some reason, I never get the "happy go lucky readings"! Here it is:

Deena says:
I see a strong marriage that is a journey of a life time
Deena says:
you are the sea he is the captain a soldier the man you rides the sea
Deena says:
you have been searching for inner peace and see a flower at the center of your mind that tells you all
Deena says:
that flower tells you what the secret to happiness is
Deena says:
everything revolves around this flower
Deena says:
I see three males I don't know what this means but I see them twice
Deena says:
three males close in age
Deena says:
and I see you I think they are your sons
Deena says:
I dont know why I see the 3 boys 2 times
Deena says:
but I see them in direct relation to you
Deena says:
attached to you
Deena says:
with you
Deena says:
part of you
Deena says:
a shadow of you
Deena says:
extentions of you
Deena says:
I see one soul
Deena says:
you are reaching for
Deena says:
trying for
Deena says:
reaching up to get
Deena says:
I see you in darkness surrounded your own negativity
Deena says:
mourning
Deena says:
being negative
Deena says:
dark
Deena says:
you are darkening your soul
Deena says:
I see hands again reaching high trying to get many but there is one who looks like you that is closesta gain one that is reaching back the one who you hope witll give you peace
Deena says:
only one
Deena says:
not two
Deena says:
I feel you will be terrified when this soul comes
Deena says:
it is something you havent' really thought threw
Deena says:
something that is frightening
Deena says:
something you should have held back with
Deena says:
fear
Deena says:
trying to hold back
Deena says:
push back
Deena says:
soemthing with worry
Deena says:
constant hands reachiing up constant hands pushing forward
Deena says:
You are will be ok. baby is a girl
Deena says:
Alinor Alioner
Deena says:
I have to find the right spelling for it
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
Eleanor was 's gram
Deena says:
that is the name I keep getting
Deena says:
Eleanor but with an A
Deena says:
I have to find the orginal spelling of Eleanor because it is with an A
Deena says:
unfortunately this wont' give you peace
Deena says:
you have to dig inside yourself
Deena says:
because this wont' give you peace
Deena says:
but I think it is your last
Deena says:
I dont' think you will have a choice
Deena says:
be careful
Deena says:
haha you are going to call her Nora for short
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
i don't know what to say....
Deena says:
I don't see anything about your house
Deena says:
I didn't do the 12 card thing I ust asked specific if you would be pg
Deena says:
I am not sure when it will be
Deena says:
how many months have you officially been ttc
Deena says:
officially I mean purposefully
Deena says:
cause I can give you a better idea
Deena says:
and tell you when I think it iwill be
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
haven't really prevented since twins birth except a few times hwen I was scared....but I guess since I got af and purposely doing it....about 5 cycles....
Deena says:
ok 5 more months
Deena says:
10th month will be the month
Deena says:
but of course I can be off
Deena says:
but this won't give you peace
Deena says:
that is something you need to find within yourself
Deena says:
this is just an obstical you think will give you peace
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
thats what the psychic told doug last year october 19th or 20th, we would get news...of course, I figured that was last year
Deena says:
Alionor
Deena says:
Alionor is the name
Deena says:
no problem
Deena says:
but there is seomthing with the three s boys but I am not seeing all what it is
Deena says:
somethingm in your shadow
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
something or bad?
Deena says:
something stressful
Deena says:
I am not sure what though
Deena says:
you need to foucse something on them
Deena says:
they are going to be on your mind alot
Deena says:
through adulthood
Deena says:
tehy will look alot like Doug when they are men
Deena says:
Alienor that is the more right spelling
Deena says:
her coming isn't about you actually
Deena says:
it is just a way of getting her here
Deena says:
you will have to deal with your own issues of peace later
Deena says:
after you have dealt with the struggle of her pg
Deena says:
to get her here safely
Deena says:
that will be your focuse
Deena says:
focus till she is born
Deena says:
once she is born (I dont' think ou will still have your uterus :( ) I think you will have to deal with other issues
Deena says:
but remember don't READ EVERYTHING INTO THIS
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
can I change things up and find peace later if I work through things now??
Deena says:
YES
Deena says:
but that is YOUR journey
Deena says:
you just "think" it is to have one more because SHE needs to get here
Deena says:
but that is not the journey for you to peace
Deena says:
but I am not 100% on the hysteroctomy
Deena says:
just a feeling
Deena says:
you feel there will be oone more child so there might be a #7 one day
Deena says:
I do think there is one more
Deena says:
a girl
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
maybe adopted?
Deena says:
Alienor
Deena says:
although she doesnt' have 5 letters
Deena says:
that is your journey
Deena says:
right now I only see this
Deena says:
and that is all I am being told
Deena says:
no more
Deena says:
thre are alot of dark things surrounding you
Deena says:
things that have nothing to do with pg
Deena says:
things that you hide from and use another to comfort you with
Deena says:
there is something that weighs you down that you think is having another but it is more
Deena says:
something darker
Deena says:
but yeah there is one more who si suppose to be here
Deena says:
I am not sure about a 7th because I dont' see it
Deena says:
doesn't mean that there isn't one
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
i wonder what the darker things are.....
Deena says:
your thoughts
Deena says:
they weigh you down
Deena says:
make life heavy
Deena says:
too many of them that are negative
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
so would you use hte clomid right away, or should I take a few months off of ttc and try to work on other things in my life (like especially losing more weight to make for a safer delivery)
Deena says:
NOOO use it right away
Deena says:
you waiting isn't going to change anything
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
when you say "something you should have held back with" I really shouldn't be doing any of this at all??
Deena says:
you honestly will have to work through that later
Deena says:
just your thoughts
Deena says:
your fears
Deena says:
that is going through your head
Deena says:
your thoughts your fears your anxiety
Deena says:
you it is all you
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
so basically its going to be a tough journey and it won't bring me what I am loing for, but it will bring me a little girl (that I do desperately want)
Deena says:
no you will get what you are looking for (a daughter) but it won't be enough
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
but I won't "feel done"
Deena says:
but you wont' know that until after she is born and you want more
Deena says:
you will think it is that
Deena says:
but it is something more
Deena says:
I think it will be because it is taken away from you n
Deena says:
the ablity to have more
Deena says:
it will alwyas be something until you deal with your own issues
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
why can't I just be a normal person that only w 2 kids its so damn frustruating bc I worry I will never feel done...
Deena says:
I wasn't a normal person
Deena says:
that it keeps darkening around you
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
I know
Deena says:
is this negativity
Deena says:
this searching for answers and wanting confirmation
Deena says:
and the answer is you have to find it in yourself
Deena says:
but you will think she is the thing to bring peace and for awhile she will
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
adn then the evil, "I want another" will hit me...which is why i think I need to have some kind of permanant birth control after next if I don't end up with a hysteroctomy, bc I feel like I am going to need some kind of finality to get to acceptance....
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
i think my main problem is that I got a soul that w like 20 children and a body that only can have like 5 or 6.....trying to find that happy medium
Deena says:
don't do something like that on purpsose
Deena says:
don't ever
Deena says:
you are not the type of person who should purposefully have permanent birth control
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
i know i never could even think about doing it before, but I sometimes hope that maybe it could "stop me" from wanting more, you know??
Deena says:
I use to feel that way
Deena says:
because I couldn't feel done I wanted to but I couldn't
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
thats just what I want....to lo at my family and feel an "ahhhaaaa" feeling....a "yep, they are all here" feeling.....
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
I definatly have a lot to think about
Deena says:
maybe you are over thinking it
Deena says:
maybe that is your problem
Deena says:
too much thinking
Deena says:
too much
drnmd1216@comcast.net says:
I personally would rather just follow my and do what feels right
Deena says:
then do that
Deena says:
stop over annalixing it
Deena says:
that is one of your biggest problems
Deena says:
too much over thinking
Deena says:
making mountain out of mole hills
Deena says:
you are worried about not feeling complete after a that isn't even concieved yet
Deena says:
that is over thinking
Deena says:
just go with your heart Melissa you can't go wrong
Deena says:
yeah stop over thinking things
Deena says:
the more I think of your cards the more it makes sense to me that you are focusing too much on over thinking

So I know some people might think card readings are hokey, but what do you think about that?? I fully understand and appreciate that God is in ultimate control, but I do think readings like this have place in life as well (kind of like a "peek" at some of God's master plan).